Even though it's into my second year of adventures in England, I still have days where I'm confused about how and why I'm here-what this Buffalonian is doing hanging out with all these Brits?! Sometimes something will go wrong or I'll get asked about where I'm from and I'll feel instantly homesick. My mind jumps to the places, people and things I wish were near; part of me will never be completely happy this side of the Atlantic- something strange and unlike me, I'm always happy! It's fun to try new things and be unaware of what life will bring each day, but it's the absence of familiarity that reminds me I'm an outsider when I want to be on the inside; it gives me the "mean reds" (if you don't know...you should probably hit up Blockbuster for Breakfast at Tiffany's!). I suppose as a remedy to homesickness, this is a sort of love note to my Buffalo home.
They say you can never go home again, things always change (as I found this summer when I returned to Buffalo for the first time in nearly a year. I felt by living/experiencing a new country, I'd slightly outgrown what I knew and am not the same person who left Buffalo last year) and though I may not live the rest of my life in Buffalo, I always know that it'll stay the same in some ways. These things create what it is to be "home" for me: The Buffalo Sabres, The Buffalo Bills, Tim Hortons, a city who loves its sports (i.e. football and hockey!) as much as it loves its food (Chef's, Duff's, Wegmans-as seen in The Office, Wolter's Bakery, Perry's ice cream, Anderson's...the list goes on and on) and 14221-these things describe what I miss most.
Even though I never really watch the Buffalo Bills (our football team), it doesn't mean I don't miss them. A sport I did watch, love and miss, is hockey. Our ice hockey team, the Buffalo Sabres, never disappoint me (even though we lost-or were cheated, depending on how you look at it-in the Stanley cup finals a few years back...). The sounds of the crowd at HSBC arena chanting: "Let's go Buf-Fa-Lo," Rick Jeanerette's voice and Khachaturian's Saber Dance help define home. Nothing compares to the feel of an arena crammed with Sabres clad fans before, during or at the end of a hockey game (especially if we win!). It's incredible. I've brought my hockey jersey here to England to remind me of my favorite team and hopefully I'll experience English ice hockey with friends next year (Coventry Blaze is one of the teams here. I'd love to see how it compares to my NHL!).
However, it makes me smile when I see English students who remind me of my American friends-I love that two girls I know at school are so close and are often seen out together (on campus or off). Allison (one of my best Buffalo friends) and I have the same kind of friendship as the English girls I know from university. We were inseparable when we met in 9th grade and have been each other's dates for dances, had dozens of sleepovers, spent summers at beach houses in Canada together, love all the same things from movies, music (Hanson!) to books and celebrity crushes (right now? Twilight men!), had the same boring part time jobs and know each other like the back of our hands. It's nice to see a relationship here which mirrors ours and reminds me of who is waiting for me back in "rough Buff."
Buffalo often conjures up images of snow. It's a staple in Buffalo conversation come November (that's usually when we get out first snow...but it can come in October-and has) and we obsess/complain/live by our powdery friend. My first drive in serious snowstorm-whiteout conditions made me feel like, "yeah, I'm from Buffalo." From November to around April our lives are controlled by that white, fluffy stuff and much as we complain, we love it really. When English people ask if we have white Christmases, I say, "damn straight, pretty much every year!" My family Christmas home videos always had snow falling in the living room window next to our sparkly tree. This year, I was over the moon that I woke to English snow (although not a true white Christmas since it didn't actually snow!). And nothing compares to the excitement a Buffalo kid feels when their school makes the "closed" list on the news channels. Buffalo snow days are for sleeping in, having soup (Campbell's or Progresso, of course) and hours spent bundled up outside making snowmen, snow angels and having snowball fights.
Often at Christmastime in England, I wish the grocery store cookie aisle would have Jingle cookies staring back at me and eggnog waiting for me in the fridge section-I miss them and their lovely Christmasy feel. I long to see TBS commercials advertising their 24 hours of A Christmas Story, which, when I lived at home, I'd watch over and over! It never gets old! "It's a klinker!"
I loved taking walks at home, not only to get Tim Hortons coffee (there are three Tim's in walking distance of my house!) but to see my neighbors, friends, my sweet little village of Williamsville or to walk on city streets like Elmwood (remembering while there to hit up the cute shops and visit Pano's for some fantastic grub!). I miss the parades along Main street in Williamsville (there is usually one for Old Home Days-a village carnival- and for Memorial Day), the smell and sights of the Buffalo waterfront and architecture. Buffalo reminds me of everything I know: radio stations (Shredd and Ragan 103.3 of course), trips to Wegmans, La Bella Sicilia (my favorite Italian restaurant!) Reid's and Becker Farms, much awaited summers that were spent at the local pool and various friends' and neighbors' backyards, streets I've lived on (not to mention learned to drive on!), the streets my friends live on and the nasally way we say "taco" (and the fact that we have damn good ones-shamelessly plugging Mighty Taco now). I always loved Buffalo but after being away, I know now that I won't ever take her for granted.
So, like a dog who's just been let loose from its leash, although I'm frightened of finishing university next year, starting a job, a new life and stepping into the big, bad world, I'll anxiously be sprinting home-a happy Buffalonian heading back to America with a trunk full of happy English memories.
**just wait...I'll have an "England on my mind" blog when I get get home! :)